Week 3 Check-in:
Morning pages? Yes. Every single day. At least 3 pages. Sometimes more. They're still mostly a running To Do list of things I "should" do or want to do, but I'm working on writing about my WIP, trying to work through plot issues, setting goals, etc.
I did write a lot about one of Week 3's topics: anger. I am very angry with myself. Angry for wasting so much time these past few years, thinking and talking more about writing than actually writing. Spending time trying to build my blogs/FB/Twitter followings when I should be spending that time writing. In an ideal world, I could do it all, but it's not an ideal world. I'm not organized enough to do it all.
Artist Date? Yes, but I didn't enjoy it as much as I'd expected to. I spent an hour at the local dollar store, going up and down every aisle looking for bargains. I did find some bargains, but I had to force myself not to speedwalk through the store. Felt like a waste of time.
Synchronicity? Well, in an un-writing-related thing, every day I drive over the railroad tracks to get to work. And every day, I think to myself as I'm swerving to avoid the mega pothole against the metal rails, "I sure wish the city would fix this." Well, early last week, I said that aloud, rather than to myself, and on the way home that very day, there was a road crew working to fill the hole. So...I guess that's synchronicity, eh? I'd prefer some with my writing, but there you go. Maybe there's been some and I've been too dense to see it...
Did I do all/any of the tasks? Um, not too many. Only a couple of them "spoke" to me. The other ones I thought were stupid and a waste of time. Which probably means I need them most, but I doubt I'll ever go back and do them.
Any other issues? Yeah. I've realized I belong to certain groups and have certain acquaintances who don't make me feel good about myself and my writing career. It's not necessarily anything they're doing, but how I feel about myself around them. It's my insecurity. Until I deal with that, I'm going to step back from those groups/people.
You know I felt the same thing. But with more probing I realized it wasn't really what other people where saying. It was my internal critic. Who was well versed in twisting and bending to keep creativity out. I realized, however, that my internal critic is mine. I get to choose whether to listen or ignore.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your journey.
The Artist Way is an excellent resource.
Hey Leanne--Oh, I realize it's my issue LOL. My own internal critic is the issue, not anything external--but for some reason, my critic reacts strongly to certain people and groups. Until I get a handle on it and learn to ignore it, I will avoid those groups as much as possible. :)
ReplyDeleteThere are interesting posts, Rebecca. Glad I popped in to read them. I'm going to check out The Artist's Way too.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work. :)
I got sidetracked, so you've nearly caught up with me (although I did do morning pages about half the time even when I didn't read the chapter).
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