PUBLIC SPEAKING = TORTURE

Please help me welcome author Melanie Atkins. Melanie a multi-published author of romantic suspense, an editor for an online publishing company, and an avid reader. Writing is more than an escape for her—it’s a way of life. She grew up in the Deep South listening to tall tales and penning stories about her cats. Now she writes gripping stories of love, suspense, and mystery with the help of her furry little feline muses.


Here's Melanie: I've always been shy and a bit unsure of myself—probably because I've always been overweight. And as a result, I've suffered from low self esteem. I love meeting new people, but it takes me a long time to open up and get to know them. And I'm terrified of speaking in front of a crowd. That panicked feeling is probably why I love the Internet so much. It's anonymous, and I don't have to talk to people face to face.

Part of my fear comes from seventh grade, I'm sure, when I signed up for speech without realizing what kind of class it was. Talk about being traumatized! Once I realized I would actually have to stand up in front of the other students and talk, I freaked out. My mom asked me to stay in the class and give it a try, so I did—until the day of my first speech, when I stood in front of the class on shaky legs listening to the boys make fun of me. My cheeks burned. I felt nauseated, and I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. The teacher wasn't any help at all. Somehow, though, I made it through my speech, but I never ever went back to that class. I went to the office the next day instead and convinced my counselor to let me drop it and add another elective. I don't even remember what it was now, but it was better than speech.


All these years later, I still don't like to speak in public. I do okay in discussions around a table, with everyone seated and many people participating, even though my face still gets warm and my cheeks flame—but I refuse to stand up in front of a group. I'm supposed to speak next month at a writers' group about three hours away, discussing my publishing history, how long it took me to get published, and where I want to go from here, and I plan to sit and deliver my talk. I've been practicing this with other people, and so far, so good. I just hope I don't panic.


Books have always been a great escape for me, and I know plenty of other introverts who read a lot, too. Be sure and check out my titles on my website at http://www.melanieatkins.com/ and on my blog at http://melanieatkins.wordpress.com/.